Words, Dominic Cadden 

Australian-English – to some it’s the fascinating evolution of a distinct dialect developed in isolation, to others it’s an oxymoron.

Believe it or not, the language actually takes its roots from the English. However when the Brits decided to set up prison here in 1777, they surrendered all rights to ‘the King’s English’ in the new land. It was like settling an island with the cast from Minder. In 1793 Watkin Tench, in A Complete Account of the Settlement at Port Jackson, wrote that the use of ‘underworld’ words, many no doubt originating in London and its near counties, was such that, ‘in our early courts of justice, an interpreter was frequently necessary to translate the deposition of the witness and the prisoner.’ Many words from this time survive here even though they have died off in the UK, such as bludger, sheila and tucker.

Nearly two generations after the First Fleet, 87 per cent of the population were either convicts, ex-convicts or of convict descent. In 1869, Australian novelist Marcus Clarke noted how these people were still in the habit of using a devised language that concealed the true meaning of the words from all except their colleagues. The most notable method was cockney rhyming slang, still in use here today, e.g “hit the frog and toad” (hit the road, leave).

While stealing the Aborigines’ land, early settlers also nicked some of their words and expressions. Many of these still survive (the words, not the Aborigines -– all but 20 were killed), e.g. bung (1841) and yakka (1847), dilly bag (man-bag) and walkabout (lost, can’t be found).

Despite the huge numbers of Irish convicts and immigrants who came to early Australia, they had little influence on Aussie English, largely because they were illiterate and Catholic, so English authorities never cared a hoot what they said. Some characteristics still leaked through, such as the pronunciation of the letter ‘H’ as ‘haitch’, ‘youse’ as the plural of ‘you’ and the expressions ‘good on you’ (‘good onya’ here) and God’s truth (‘strewth’). A few Irish words of the age also survive here, such as wowser (1899), chook (1855) and dag (1867).

Both the Irish and Australian also love to use litotes such as, ‘you’re not wrong’ (= you’re right). Aussies take this to an extreme, with what Australian poet and publisher Max Harris called ‘perverse reversals’. A common example will be a red-haired bloke nicknamed Bluey, or someone addressing their best mate as ‘sh**features’. But Australian-English is a strange battle between cryptic complexity versus laziness. Rather than be arsed saying words of more than two syllables, Aussies truncate words so they end in either ‘o’ or ‘ie’. Refugee, derelict, vegetarian, businessman, service station, afternoon and geologist become reffo, derro, vejjo, bizzo, servo, arvo and geo. Sickness leave, electrician, postal worker, mosquitoes, relatives and underpants become sickie, sparkie, postie, mozzies, rellies and undies. There’s also a love of acronyms that preceded text messaging, such as BYO (bring your own), POQ (piss off quick), PGB (post-grog bog), OS (overseas) and ESB (Eastern States Bastard). This has even extended to contractions of contractions, such as ‘Carn’ for ‘C’mon’.

There is a misconception, however, that Australians have lazy annunciation, but it’s just that historically, it was safer to talk with the mouth barely open in order to keep out flies, mosquitoes and redback spiders. The practise continued, however, and even now if Aussies can see your mouth moving they will think you’re an arse-bandit, a try-hard or an intellectual.

Regional accents are also somewhat of a myth, at least compared to England, where in the distance it takes to fetch a cricket ball hit for six, the whole local dialect has changed. There are some changes in vocabulary, most notably based on important items such as swimwear and beer. For example, in Perth a stubby is a 375ml bottle of beer but in Darwin it is a 1.25 litre bottle of beer, which says a lot about Darwin, really. Other regional terms are based on local geography, such as WA’s ‘Broome time’ (slowing down, not straining in the heat), or NSW’s ‘Gosford skirt’ (a very short skirt, so named because Gosford is just south of The Entrance).

There are minor regional variations in accent you should be aware of, most notably North Queensland, where the vowels are so long and speech so slow that short sentences may take upwards of 15 minutes to complete. In fact, in Queensland as a whole, people often get halfway through a sentence then complete the rest with “rah-rah-rah” just to save time. Living in WA, you can sound more like a local by putting extra syllables in single vowel sounds, e.g. beer becomes ‘bee-ah’. Also mark the end of your sentences with ‘eh?’ which is a practise that perhaps has its origins from a time when the main form of communications for the far-flung colony was Morse code (i.e. 1979). Here are a few terms that may also help you out.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

A
After-dinner mint – sex in exchange for a restaurant meal. Also dead cert.
Amber fluid – also turps, grog, piss, frothy chop, etc. Aussies have so much reverence for beer that they dare not actually say the word.
Ankle-biter – small child.
Apeshit – wildly enthusiastic or angry. See also going off.
Arsey – lucky, audacious. Famously used by Shane Warne when an English batsman had a wild swing for six: “You arsey c***!”     

B
B & S – Bachelors’ and Spinsters’ Ball. A bush coming-of-age ritual where lonely young men and women get together to drink, tear up paddocks (aka circlework) in utes and have sex.
Bail (out) – to leave or withdraw, often angrily or with regret, e.g. “Steve-o went apeshit when he had to bail from the strip joint ’cos his missus went into labour.”
Ball Tearer – a Good Thing, a ripper.
Bingle – car accident. No relation to Aussie model Lara Bingle, although no doubt she does cause the odd car accident.
Basically… – Some 38% of all Aussie sentences start this way. It indicates important information ahead.

C
Cactus – dead, broken, what something is after it has carked it, e.g. “Basically, me mobile carked it when I was talking to me ankle-biter. It’s cactus now.”
Chew the fat – a chinwag, a relaxed chat, as opposed to an earbashing.
Chocka – full up      
Compo – worker’s compensation: the national form of supplementary superannuation.
Cooking with gas – everything is proceeding as expected or better.

D
Dalkeith tractor – Perth equivalent of Chelsea tractor. A 4WD owned by wealthy people, driven (not well) only in the nicest urban environments, e.g. “the Dalkeith tractor had parked so close I thought it was rutting my exhaust pipe.”
Dead set – that’s correct. Can also be used to question the truth of a statement.
(same) Diff – the equivalent; or “it doesn’t matter to me”.
Donk – an engine, always “big”, usually V8. See hoon and legend.
Dropkick – from “dropkick punt” in Australian Rules football, this term used to be rhyming slang for the derogatory term for female genitalia. It now means a silly or stupid person.
Duck’s guts (the) – the heart of the matter.

E
Entrepreneur – Perth slang for criminal. Comes from the 1980s, Perth’s golden age of arsey businessman, such as Alan Bond. Bond later went to prison, where he taught the secrets of business success to impressionable (Perth slang for gay) young inmates.
Ethnic – a term officially introduced to supersede derogatory terms for migrant communities. Now adopted as an all-encompassing term of abuse for ALL foreigners.

F
Fair go – a butch way of saying, “Be nice to me.”
Fart-arse (around) – to waste time, do nothing productive. “Everything was cooking with gas at work, so I just fart-arsed around the rest of the arvo.”
Feral – someone who leads an alternative lifestyle; often crusty, unclean, uncouth people. More often than not from Fremantle.

G
Going off – something a fun or exciting place does, as does someone in a crazed, furious or orgasmic state.
Grot – unclean, untidy and/or impolite person.
Gutless wonder – a coward, someone who doesn’t stand up for themselves, or someone who bails on you.

H
Hoon – a fast, reckless driver of a boat or car, especially if this is their primary leisure activity.
Hostage negotiations – the measured release, on a case by case basis, and after due and diligent consideration, of poo.

I
Iffy – something that’s a bit suspicious or of dubious quality.
I’m easy – I’ll go with whatever decision is made, i.e. NO sexual connotation.  

J
Jarrah jerker – a timber-getter, more often used now for any worker in the bush.
Just down the road – literal term, although note should be taken of how long the ‘road’ is, as it may end in Bunbury. Esperance, on the other hand, is, “a cut lunch and a water bag away”. Further away from civilisation is woop-woop, then outback, then beyond the black stump.

K
‘Kin oath – Definitely. Synonym: abso-bloody-lutely.
Knocker -– somebody who criticises when the criticism isn’t wanted.

L
Legend – a person who excels, is a champion or hero, or all around good guy. Often forgotten by the time he or she comes back from two weeks in Bali.
Lob up – to arrive, usually late or unexpectedly.
Lucky Country – Australia, with exceptions made for the droughts, floods, poisonous animals, xenophobia, vast masses of uninhabitable desert, crap football team and man-eating sharks.

M
Map of Tassie – a woman’s pubic area.   
Mate! – A confusing and often contradictory one-word sentence that may mean: 1) Hullo 2) Would you mind... ? 3) It is good to see you again 4) I sympathise 5) Well done! 6) You should not have done that (i.e. thankful or anger) 7) I will punch you if you don’t do what I say.

N
Noonga – A semi-racist term (from the Noongar Aboriginal people of south-west WA) as slang for ‘idiot’ or ‘fool’. Today used by mainly non-Aboriginal Western Australian people to or about other non-Aboriginal people as a non-offensive term for silly, e.g. “What kind of noonga pays for extended warranty?”
Noah – a contraction of rhyming slang: Noah’s ark = shark
Nuddy – nude, the condition in which Australian men believe they most resemble Superman.

O
Ocker – Stereotypical and clichéd Australian person or behaviour. “He hoons around in a ute with a big donk, loves the amber fluid, lives off his Compo cheque and last week he did a nuddy run at the footy. He’s a dead-set legend.”
Off one’s face/tits – extremely drunk or drugged.
On for young and old – a situation that is out of control, but most often refers to a fight or argument.
Onya – short for good on you, although it can also mean, “You’re a prick for what you just did.”

P
Pash – a long passionate kiss involving groping.
Piece of piss – an easy task.
Pig’s arse! – I fervently disagree.
Piker – anyone who doesn’t want to do the same social activities as you or leaves them before you.

R
Rapt – short for of enraptured, but a far simpler and less noncey word that surfers and sports jocks can pronounce, e.g. “I’m real rapt with that result.”
Reckon – Aussies don’t think, concur, believe, agree, consider or surmise. They reckon. Also Whaddyareckon? becomes a whole sentence.
Red hot crack – a strong attempt. Not to be confused with the top of a recent Pommie immigrant’s bum after a weekend on Cottesloe.
Rooted – tired. Not necessarily from rooting (sex), but same diff.
Root rat – Man or woman on the prowl for or very amenable to sex.

S
She’ll be right – I hate you for putting me in this compromising position.
Skimpy – containing little excess, e.g. “a skimpy budget”. Also a topless bartender.
Slab – a carton of 24 cans (tinnies) or stubbies of beer. Also used as a measure of weight, e.g. “My missus is little – she only weighs about four slabs.”
Smoko – originally a 10-15 minute break from work for a cigarette, it now means a break for any drink or food.
Sook - a soft or weak-willed person. Verb: crying or moping.
Spewin – very angry or panicked. No vomiting is usually involved.
Sparrow’s fart – dawn.
Squiz – a scrutinising look.
St George’s Terrace cocky – someone who owns a country property, often for tax loss purposes, but who lives and works in Perth.
Stunned mullet – a person who is confused, bewildered or astonished to the point of inertia. Also a turd floating in the surf.

T
Tall poppies – successful people. Also tall poppy syndrome, the national pastime of knocking successful people.
Tinnie – a can of beer or a small open metal boat, even though both are made of aluminium.
Too-hard basket – Aboriginal issues or any other constantly procrastinated matters.
Turps – any alcoholic drink except turpentine.

U
Up yourself – having a large ego, an idiot
with only one person in his perfect relationship; an American.
Ute – a utility van, one of Australia’s proudest inventions. Often considered the mark of a dead-set legend, and circlework the only real art form.

V
Vegemite, happy little – a contented person. Derived from an advertising campaign where happy children eating Vegemite are described as happy little Vegemites.
Veg out – relax in front of the TV.

W
White pointers – topless female sunbathers.
Wobbly – a display of agitation over something trivial, e.g. “She cooked me dinner, we had a root, then she chucked a wobbly when I had to leave straight away.” (See wombat)
Wogball – football.
Wombat – a man who uses a woman for sex and free meals, named after the animal that eats roots and leaves.

X
Xxy – excessively expensive.

Y
Yakka – actual work, as opposed to fart-arsing about.
Yobbo – an uncouth and uncontrolled person, usually off his face.
Yonks – a long time. Roughly.

Z
Zipper-sniffer – any man perceived to display predatory homosexual behaviour, e.g. the lock in a rugby scrum.
Zonked – a fading state of consciousness, usually caused by drugs or alcohol. Also spifflicated, para(lytic); one step past “blind”.